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How to Become His Girlfriend

You’ve been dating him.

Or because you’re rusty in being a Prize Catch, you’ve just been hanging out with him.

Or even sleeping with him.

Or even being his nice friend.

Or maybe he doesn’t know you exist.

You’re into him, that’s for sure.

But are you on the right track?

Can you take this thing to the next level?

Or turn things around if it goes sour?

Why shouldn’t you have sex with him?

Can you bring up the relationship issue?

Why can’t you ask him to be your boyfriend?

What is the Danger Zone?

What is the Safe Make-Out Zone?

Why should you believe in the Power of Withholding Sex?

What is the Checklist for Boyfriend Potential?

Get this EGuide to find out and keep it within grabbing distance!

$15 “Become His Girlfriend” EGuide……………………..ADD TO CART

Order other EGuides here. For confidential Email Exchange, Get Personalized Advice.

225 Comments
  1. Kathleen permalink

    Hi I just brought your e guide and I am still waiting for a link where I can download it please :)

    • Kathleen,

      I sent it to you on the same day you ordered, Sunday, July 6. Let me know you if you need me to send it again, thanks!

  2. Nicole permalink

    I met this guy online and we talked for awhile online and then finally transitioned to texting and talked there for a bit. As soon as I felt comfortable we met up for drinks and really hit it off. He lives about an hour from me and works weird hours (weekends and most weekdays) and I have a normal weekday business hours job, so if I see him it’s usually on a work night. We’ve gone out a couple times for drinks, I’ve met his sisters, he has even taken me out to dinner, pays for everything, and also got us a room and wine for the last date. It’s been a month now, it seems promising… He texts everyday and always treats me like I’m his girlfriend when we’re out anywhere together. But then I noticed he checks/updated his online dating profile. I mean.. What gives? Should I ask him about it/where we stand? Maybe delete MY online profile and hope he notices and follows suit? Is it too soon to feel this jealous/crazy/clingy?

    • Nicole,

      Please get the “Online Dating” EGuide and “Become His Girlfriend” EGuide. They tell you everything you need to know about what to do in your situation.

      For now, just keep in mind that UNTIL a guy asks you to be his exclusive girlfriend, never assume you are, and always assume he’s still looking around for a better candidate. And you should be too. You should be dating multiple men and have a slew of suitors to choose from. This way you are prevented from obsessing over one guy. Putting your eggs all in one basket is something a Prize Catch refrains from doing, knowing that would severely limit her options.

      Men automatically know to never limit their options. Women should learn to do so as well!

      So there is no need for you to ask him anything. If he’s not ready, he won’t be just because you ask. The less interest you show him, the more interest he’ll show you!

  3. Hello The One!
    I just bought the Eguide for “How to become HIS girlfriend” but I haven’t got the guide nor understood how download it :( ….
    Can you please send me the Eguide or tell me how I should do it?

    Thank you!

    • Victoria,

      I did send it the day you ordered it and don’t know why there is a problem. Anyway, I just sent you another email with the PDF. Just scroll below and you will see the link to click on. It should open up for you to read. If you need me to copy and paste it to the email directly, let me know and I can do that.

      Also, thank you for the wonderful Testimonial you posted! I deeply appreciate your kind words. Again, let me know if you are able to download the PDF and that you received it!

  4. Serena permalink

    I’ve been dating a guy (23 yrs old) for about 5 months. We met online and instantly hit it off after our first date.he lives about an hour and a half away and both of us are super busy during the week. He with work & me with college. Sadly we don’t get to see each other very often. Sometimes we hang out for 3 weekends straight & other times we go for a whole month without hanging out (since Saturday is his only free day, so in a week if we can’t hang out Saturday we have to wait for another whole week to do so.) We text almost every day & we are very involved in each others life, his meet my brothers & I haven’t met his family because they live out of state. Everything seems to be going great, but I’m worried that he hasn’t asked me to be his girlfriend. We have said that we aren’t dating anyone else but I wish we were more commited like in an actual relationship. How can I ask him if he sees things becoming more serious without scaring him off. I feel that since we act as if we were in a relationship he probably dosent feel the need to as me to be in one.

    • Serena,

      Sadly, I don’t see how you two could even be dating if you’re just hanging out together. A date is something a man plans and executes. He comes to pick you up and pays. Why? Because he wants to impress you and let you know how interested he is in you. There is no confusion as to what a date is. When a guy merely hangs out, he isn’t trying to prove to you how he feels. He is only doing what is easy and convenient, like any friend in the world.

      It looks to me like you two are definitely seeing each other if inconsistently. You’re absolutely right in that if you act like his girlfriend, he won’t need to make you one. To know what to say to him, I highly recommend getting the EGuides specifically for your situation: “How to Become His Girlfriend” and to be ahead of the game, “How to Be a Prize Catch Girlfriend”. Or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

  5. Josephine permalink

    Hello,

    I am 17 and the guy I am seeing for about 3 months now is 18. We act like a couple and we kiss, hug, go to the movies, our families even met, he says he loves me and that im “his girl” ect. But he never asked me to be his girlfriend So whenever someone asks us if we go out I don’t know what to really say
    I must say he’s kinda shy and he just broke up with his ex like a month before we started seeing each other and they went out for 2 years and his ex is already in a relationship so I don’t know if he still misses her but from what he told me about her it doesn’t seems like he misses her. should I ask him? Or should I wait? I don’t like the fact that we are like couple but not officially.

    • Josephine,

      When you give away the goods for free, a guy will take them and not pay. He’ll gladly enjoy them while they last. It doesn’t matter if he’s shy. He could have purple polka dots or a disease. You don’t have one way of treating shy men and another way of treating alpha men. There is only one way to behave to all suitors: Be a Prize Catch.

      Tell him you need to be in a committed relationship, and will move on since you’re not in one. Then go. He needs to stop you from leaving or let you get away because he can’t commit.

      The EGuides will tell you what it takes to be a Prize Catch and more!

  6. So I’ve been talking to this guy since November he came to my birthday event in January we’ve been in touch n nysync ever since we text everyday go out occasionally because of our schedules take in mine we both are local thoe…sooo that’s a little background over time since November we have just grew in feelings emotions etc we’ve found out we are identical like he’s my DNA twin we were so alike that had to make sure we wasn’t kin.. Lol.. We’re not (whew) lol… But newho… Questions have gotten steamy about rship etc he’s been single for five years so he has became comfortable… Used to it… Because he don’t mind being single but welcome the opportunity of a rship…soooo we start getting closer in dating…he ends up venturing back to his baggage aka old girls or girls that’s been around whom he used to date etc…so he had me the one he wants to be with long term wife etc one day then he has this other chick who had nothing on me but history he saids to me your the one I want I’m trying to spare feelings etc…in at a fork in the road… I’m trying to pull the clutch on stop doing the temporary dating thing n being on my relationship thing…but I just need time to get my shyt together… I know I’m being selfish etc.. I’m like u can’t have your cake n eat it too… Sooo he’s a very good guy worth the wait for sure…but he needs to show me more attention etc that he really dosent want to see me out his life I’m trying to be patient etc..but it’s difficult I’m still communicating with my old ppl I used to date or hang out with to distract time in hopes he get it together n realize I will be the best he never HAD! I don’t understand if I’m everything u want for yourself y are you procrastinating is it he needs a safety bet “if” we don’t work out like y think like that there’s risk to everything basically I’m ready to be in a rship I’m tired of dating I believe I found my soulmate and so does he…. But he’s been single for so long trying keep friendships with the other girl n just messing up all the way around… I’m trying to give him until the middle of the summer if he hasn’t cut that b%€>€ ch off by then I’m GONE!!! N I told him I don’t want to b your friend…in the DNA because that hurts too much.. Especially when we both know its no doubt in our minds we will b just find my mom wants grand kids dammit lol!! I’m in no rush I say that to say some men need a snap fix on reality…f that temporary stuff longevity is where it is…
    So a recap we’ve been talking since nov…then dating since like February but not exclusively dating just dating trying to get to the exclusive but he’s stuck!!!! Trying figure out his crap when I’m READY!!!! What do you guys think?!?!

    • Until he actually plans a date and takes you out, and does it over and over, he’s not even worth thinking about! Know how to distinguish the suitors from the timewasters. Let him have his female friends — you don’t want a friend. You want a suitor.

      I urge you to get your secret weapon in dating and relationships when you Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

      Knowledge is your responsibility!

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  8. Mellisa permalink

    Hi,there is this guy I really like.am 24 and his 27.I’ve met him at my workplace a couple of times when he comes to see his friends.his friend tells me he talks about me when they play soccer n his friend also teases us that we would make a nice couple.we’ve made eye contact n we’ve caught each other staring.he invited me for soccer once,bt I told him to make it an official invitation n he laughed about it n I haven’t seen him ever since.I don’t know whether to forget about him n just move on,because if he really wanted me he would have asked his friend 4 my number!I don’t know what to do!

    • Mellisa,

      If he really wanted you, he would NOT have asked his friend for your number, but ask YOU directly for your number. And he wouldn’t have given up so easily and not ask you out officially. If he was interested, he would have seized the opportunity to talk to you instead of leaving it all up in the air.

      If you want a man with no guts, keep liking him and maybe not ever get anywhere. There is nothing for you to do unless you want to do all the work and exhaust yourself — possibly find out his friends were just egging him on and he never was interested.

      Review False Indicators of a Man’s Interest. Staring is one of them. So don’t fall for it.

      I urge you to get your secret weapon in dating and relationships when you Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

      Hope to help you further!

  9. Yasmin permalink

    HI my name is Yasmin

    So I met this guy about 7 years ago, we fell in love but we were young and things didn’t work out so we became best friend. since two year ago we had feelings for each other but never at the same time. Now I have develop strong feeling for him and well he treats me nice, takes me out, and sometimes say thing that leads me to believe that he can have feelings for me but then he will say we are better off as friends, I think we have a strong close friendship and physically attraction, that will make for ideal relationship but I am not sure if he really doesnt love me or maybe he needs me to make him fall in love with me again or maybe I should just move on or maybe he just physically attracted to me but doesn’t see me as a girlfriend material.

    • Yasmin,

      If he didn’t ask you to become his girlfriend, then it is only friendship he feels for you. Accept it and respect his decision. You want a guy who really wants you, enough to make you his girlfriend and not be satisfied with being friends. You don’t ever want to have to persuade or convince a guy to want you.

      A Prize Catch is no beggar. Nor does she accept crumbs. Move on. If he chases you, all the better. If he doesn’t, well, he never lied or pretended, did he?

      I urge you to get your secret weapon in dating and relationships when you Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

      Hope to help you further!

  10. Anna E. permalink

    hi, i have this guy that i really really like and he even likes me back. we’ve been texting for about 3 months now, and we texted almost everyday and almost everytime. there’s one problem though… we texted as if we’re already a couple, such as like “i miss you” or “you’re cute/beautiful in every situation” or sometimes he says things like this, “can’t live without you/life is hard without you” and he even told me he loves me but i back down and told him i’m not ready to say those words. but i did tell him i like like him a lot. then, he kept asking me to go lunch with him but i always declined saying i’m not ready. but the truth is i am ready and i’m just waiting for him to ask me to be his girlfriend. but he never asks. i want to us to be an official couple but i’m afraid if i tell him i want to be his girlfriend he might be influenced by the idea and only doing it because i tell him so, and not because he wanted to… i want it to be like this, when we’re an official couple then i will gladly go to lunch with him. what should i do? should i be patient and give him time? plus, his friend told me that he really want to be a couple but he never ask.
    please help :C

    • Anna E.,

      Why don’t you go to lunch with him? Why do you have to be his girlfriend first? You’re deciding just from texting that he’s good enough to be your boyfriend? Don’t rely only what he’s saying. Words are cheap.

      Find out what he’s really like. Not just one lunch, but two, three, four, five, and six lunches.

  11. Anne permalink

    Hi One Truth,

    Have you considered writing a post about contemporary romantic comedy movies, that how falsely they usually portray the female-male relationships and thus provide a very bad example to young women?

    The best example I can give is the movie ‘About Time’ (2013, was rated 7.9 on IMDB!). I am so horrified that young women are watching this and they believe that this is the way how lasting relationships are formed. It is so unrealistic and goes the opposite of everything you’re saying in this blog. I.e. they have sex on the first date, fall in love right away, and then become happily married ever after………..

    In contrast, for example ”When Harry met Sally” (1993, my favourite) I believe perfectly illustrates the reality about relationships and probably gives away a lot of information to women about how men think in general and how women should conduct themselves in general.

    Have you seen this movies? I would recommend writing a post reflecting on how far these usually can deviate from reality, and why young girls just shouldn’t believe (or watch) these movies.

    Thanks!
    :)

    • Anne permalink

      I mean, while watching the movie ”About Time” I was literally sickened by its tremendous idealism and couldn’t help myself but think of all the girls (including some of my close friends) who will believe it’s real life and will learn the truth the hard way. :(

    • Anne,

      No, I haven’t seen that movie (About Time). Movies are very powerful subliminally, especially when you’re sitting inside a theater with the acoustics blaring in your ears and images blasting into your brain. Movies are a conditioning tool to give you an emotional experience and imprinting lasting memory. It is effective brainwashing for good or bad.

      You are absolutely right in that what is portrayed in that movie would be a bad example for dating. Romantic movies made these days are unrealistic. To mimic what they do in these movies is a sure way to falling flat on your face instead of ending up happily.

      Unfortunately, for me to talk about such movies would require me to watch them, which I don’t wish to do! Call me old-fashioned, but movies made before 1960 are best in showing how a Prize Catch behaves.

      Since you have your finger on the movie pulse, feel free to post your thoughts and start a discussion!

  12. Kristina permalink

    Hi, I had a boyfriend that almost lasted 3 years but he dumped me because we had some problems. Two months had passed then I received a call from him and we got together to talk one day then the next day we ended up sleeping together and he says if I’ll accept to being friends with benefits I’ve never believed in all that but because I was deeply in love I only accepted with the idea that this down the road will become serious because we had issues to work over so I did. There was even a moment he wanted to ask me to be his girl again but he said “I really want to but I’m not ready”. Months had passed from that and now he says ” I like being single”. I’ve even got to extreme because I’ve talked to him through my brother him thinking that he’s talking to my brother I’ve asked how serious he is about me and he says “I love her but I need to better myself if I want to give her something she deserves” and etc then why does he tells me he likes being single I feel like I’ve been on my knees begging wanting him to ask me to be his girl again so that I can finally tell people why I’m happy and not feel like this. In a couple’s of days will be my anniversary of being single in front of the eyes of my family and friends because I’ve kept this secret from everyone and in 2 months will be my anniversary of being friends with benefits.

    • Kristina,

      It only matters what he tells you if his words match his actions. Just look at his actions for they speak the whole truth.

      For a lot more detailed information specific to your situation, I urge you to get your secret weapon in dating and relationships when you Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

      Hope to help you further!

  13. Mina permalink

    I have a really good example of prize catch behavior I’d like to share…and how it weeds out the time wasters.

    I had a date with a guy I was so-so about. I was so-so about him because the first time he texted me, he asked for a picture. He got my number in person, so my looks were not a mystery. I said I wasn’t really comfy with that yet, and asked if could he maybe send me a pic first. He got mad and tried to make me feel bad. “Why won’t you just be nice and send it?” he’d say. “You go first, please” I’d say. I never sent anything. He got kind of mad over it and I wrote him off as a whiner/emo mamasboy.

    Anyway, I heard nothing from him for a week after that and forgot about him. Then he texted me asking to grab a drink one evening after work. I figured, well, he’s trying to make a real date, there is nothing wrong with accepting if I would enjoy a drink after work one day this week. I probably should have said no, but I really did need a drink after my stressful workweek. If he was weird in person, I fully intended on taking a few sips of my drink, paying for it, and excusing myself to leave. So, I accepted.

    TEN minutes before our date he texted me with a lame excuse about not being able to make it. Ten minutes, seriously? The drive time to the bar from where he was was longer than 10 minutes. I knew immediately that he was BSing me and just trying to get a reaction. He was probably still mad he didn’t get his way when it came to me sending him a picture. My reply to him? “Sure. Enjoy your evening.”

    Then he immediately replied “I wish you would come hang out with me”. Yep, time waster confirmed, this guy is full of it. No date, but you want me to come hang out with your 38 year old behind? ROFL. Ignored that message.

    NEXT!

    • Sara permalink

      I am sick of men asking to “hang out”. Like what does that even mean!?! One guy actually said, “Can I take you on a date??” I was like…haha…wow he finally gets that I say “no” to every “hang out” invitation. Then after the date, which was very formal, he texted “So great hanging out with you”. I was thinking, “WTF??” Then he kept asking me to “hang out”. I just kept getting confused. Like he actually seemed like he wanted to “date” me…but kept using the lame “hang out” language. I finally just gave up bc he was too juvenile…and this is late 20s!! Like these men are soo immature. Then, they get pouty when you turn them down…it’s like…well I am turning you down bc you don’t make your intentions clear and give me vague invitations!! DUH DUMMY. I think the problem is women accept so many pointless “hang out” invitations that men think it is perfectly acceptable!

      • Sara,

        So true!

        Incidentally, men born before the 1980′s (definitely before 1975) don’t ever confuse a date with a hangout. Offering a woman to “hang out” just did not occur to men born in those times, so it’s a phenomenon that is being experienced by subsequent generations such as yours — sadly!

      • agree with you Sara.

  14. Natalie permalink

    I like this guy on my class. But a lot of people say that he likes me too but when we get on the bus his friends are so mean when he is not around. But he’s friends in the classroom they like me and they want him To go out with me so at lunch his friends asked me if I wanted to go out with him. I didn’t say anything but my BFF did she said yes cuz she thought that was the truth but I think it isn’t!!! I REALLY WANNA GO OUT WITH SO PLEASE HELP ME!!!!! 💋~Natalie

    • Natalie,

      His friends are mean to you and they want him to go out with you? Makes no sense! Don’t ever scream in desperation for a guy. Know your worth!

  15. Emily permalink

    Hi, so for about the past month or so I’ve been falling for this guy but the problem is he has a girlfriend. When I found out I was devastated. I don’t even know her or anything! Yesterday we were texting back and forth and he told me he liked me and that I was beautiful and stuff like that. But I told him “isn’t this cheating on your gf?” He just said he liked me and her equally…. Right now I feel very confused and I don’t know what to do :/ thanks ~Emily

    • Emily,

      As soon as you found it, you should have stopped all contact. Why remain devastated? Simply stop talking to him or seeing him ever, until he becomes single and free to pursue you. He won’t be cheating on his girlfriend if you stop all contact with him. So do this for your own sake.

      For a lot more detailed information specific to your situation, Get In-Depth Advice Now via confidential Email Exchange, or get your secret weapon in dating when you Order EGuides Today.

      Hope to help you further!

  16. So, I’ve been knowing this guy since I was a kid. We grew up together.I had started liking him our junior year in highschool but then I forced myself to not like him anymore because of our friendship. Over the summer of last year , I started back liking him…I don’t know where the feeling came from it just happened. But we text every now and them when he’s in Hawaii,which is where he’s stationed at but now that he’s home, he acts like he doesn’t even know me. I seen him at a party and all he did was stare at me and kept it moving with his ex(whom cheated on him). I don’t know what to do. I want to tell him how I feel but I also just want to cut him off and forget he even exist.

    • VP,

      Cut him off and forget he exists. That’s what you should do. It doesn’t matter how much you want him. It first matters how much he wants you, which is not at all according to his actions. Always go by what you see and hear him doing.

      For a lot more detailed information specific to your situation, Get In-Depth Advice Now via confidential Email Exchange, or get your secret weapon in dating when you Order EGuides Today.

      Hope to help you further!

  17. Ashley permalink

    So my ex boyfreind still talks to me and it’s been a month that we broke up.And 2 weeks after we broke up he got a gf,but now like 2 weeks ago he have me mixed emotions that he still likes me and barely about 2 days ago he said he did.But he tells his gf he lovers her?and it gets me mad that he screenshots the convos and sends them to me.what do you think?

    • Ashley,

      He wants to get double lucky. Don’t fall for it. If he really wants you back, he can break up with his girlfriend first. But that isn’t happening so tell him to stop sending you that stuff or go ahead and block him from your phone. If he’s an ex, he shouldn’t be contacting you anymore, and you shouldn’t be accepting his messages.

      For a lot more detailed information specific to your situation, Get In-Depth Advice Now via confidential Email Exchange, or get your secret weapon in dating when you Order EGuides Today.

      Hope to help you further!

  18. Amanda permalink

    Ok, so ive known this guy for almost three years and instantly it was love at first sight. But im 4 years younger than him and eventually he forgot about me but I still have strong feelings for him. Im going to see him at a party this weekend and I dont know how to react what if things get out of hand. Again im a freshman and hes a senior in highschool

    • Amanda,

      Things can only get out of hand if you don’t know how to say no and decline being taken advantage of. So enjoy yourself at the party without getting physical whatsoever. Being four years older he may not even be suitable for you.

      For a lot more detailed information specific to your situation, Get In-Depth Advice Now via confidential Email Exchange, or get your secret weapon in dating when you Order EGuides Today.

      Hope to help you further!

  19. shirley permalink

    im dating a guy whn we first met he told me he have a girlfrind i ddnt care coz i ddnt love him that much now ive developd strong feelings for him i dnt knw wht to do to win him.

    • Shirley,

      Because you didn’t care he had a girlfriend and went ahead and fell for him anyway, you are now in a situation where you feel helpless. A prize catch never competes for a guy. She doesn’t have to, because she wants someone who will cherish her, not make her play second fiddle.

      For a lot more detailed information specific to your situation, Get In-Depth Advice Now via confidential Email Exchange, or get your secret weapon in dating when you Order EGuides Today.

      Hope to help you further!

  20. Haley permalink

    Hello,
    So I’ve been talking to this guy I know since the end of july so about 6 months but knew him prior to us talking. Anyways we have been texting a little. Sometimes involving very intimate things… well most of the time thats what we talk about. Like one day then skip a day or two then that day on and on for 6 months sometimes more during the week or less. Nevertheless we have hung out twice. First time we just chilled at his house and talked I knew he wanted to kiss and other things but I refused and said we needed to take it slow. Well we just recently hung out again on Monday. Things went quite different this time. We started to kiss and make out and it moved on to our clothes being off touching everything but NOT having sex. Well during these past days between monday and now I figured I would have at least a text from him telling me how good of a time he had or wanting to hang out again. It hasnt happened yet. Keep in mind ive had a huge crush on him for 4 years. So im getting antsy waiting and I know that he snapchats other girls and likes their pictures on fb… which I dont particularly care for but it doesnt make me angry. So I guess what im asking is should I wait for him to talk to me or should I talk to him or just forget him because he got what he wanted? I really like this guy and want him to commit to me instead of thinking im a booty call and going for other girls too… Im confused and would love some insight. Thanks so much!

    • Haley,

      Talking to a guy and hanging out with him never goes anywhere. Actual dates planned by him are the only way.

      For a lot more detailed information specific to your situation, Get In-Depth Advice Now via confidential Email Exchange, or get your secret weapon in dating when you Order EGuides Today.

      Hope to help you further!

  21. mellary permalink

    I mean I work hard I’m in high school

  22. mellary permalink

    I didn’t really work cuz no matter how much time I asked him to walk with me to athletics he will but he doesn’t or won’t speak to me heart to heart I can’t read him our past relationship didn’t work out he was flirting with other girls OLDER THAN ME!* please help!*

    • Mellery,

      His flirting with other girls means he can’t be that into you, right? Don’t beg for his attention anymore.

      For a lot more detailed information specific to your situation, Get In-Depth Advice Now via confidential Email Exchange, or get your secret weapon in dating when you Order EGuides Today.

      Hope to help you further!

  23. Priya permalink

    Hi…
    I met this guy 2 months back through a social networking site.We have met around 4 times in last 1 month.We are not dating,he is single but not ready for any sorts of commitment.I sort of like him but i have a long distance relationship since a long time,even though the communication between me any my long distance bf is very less but still officially we are dating.I talk a lot more with this new guy and i love his company,we even talk romantically at times.Now am very confused about what to do…should i break up with my existing BF ??…..should i be dating this new guy ??…..But then am not sure about his feelings too….please help!

    • Priya,

      Of course you need to break up with your existing boyfriend in order to start dating a new guy. How would you feel if a guy was two-timing you? If you want to be single and date multiple men, that’s fine. As long as you don’t have a boyfriend.

      For more on your situation, Get In-Depth Advice Now via confidential Email Exchange, or get your secret weapon in dating when you Order EGuides Today.

      Hope to help you further!

  24. Ally permalink

    Hi,
    So I have been dating this guy for 2 months now.
    Here is a big deal and important that the guy asks the girl “do you want to be my girlfriend?” in order to be official.
    We act and talk as if we were boyfriend and girlfriend. We’re together every day, we kiss, I met his parents, he has been in my house, we hang out every week. He has told me many many times he already wants me to be his girlfriend, but he just doesn’t ask. Sometimes it looks like he is too comfortable with us being like this, as if there is no hurry. I have tried to talk to him about it and he said of course we will be boyfriend and girlfriend, and that he won’t let me go.
    He is just perfect, what every girl dreams of. He just doesn’t ask, and I can’t push him anymore cause it would look too bad. I don’t know what to do!

  25. Jen Jones permalink

    Hi, ive been dating a guy for 4 months that has committment issues. We spend a lot of time together, have great chemistry and usually communicate everyday but sometines go a day or 2 withour contact. We are both 33. We have a great time together, his friends love me and say they hope he keeps me around forever and that I’m a great catch. We agreed we are not seeing other people and spend 4 nights a week together but his hangup is not feeling obligated to going to all of my friends events. What do I do? Isn’t this basically a relationship?

    • Jen,

      Did he tell you he can’t commit or do you assume he has commitment issues because he doesn’t want to join your friends?

      If he doesn’t want to go, it’s not due to commitment issues, but due to possibly because he just doesn’t think it’s any fun for him. Ask him why he won’t go, and if he doesn’t, just go and have a nice time without him. If you absolutely MUST have a boyfriend who joins you with your friends, then he isn’t the one. Either be happy with the way he is, or let him go and find someone else.

      For a lot more detailed information specific to your situation, Get In-Depth Advice Now via confidential Email Exchange, or get your secret weapon in dating when you Order EGuides Today.

      Hope to help you further!

      • Jen Jones permalink

        He told me he can’t commit 2 months ago. And surprise, now he’s doing the disappearing act. You would think a guy you’re dating for 4 months would at least have enough respect to have a conversation about it being over if it is.

        • Jen,

          When he told you he couldn’t commit 2 months ago, you should have said good-bye. Hanging in there got you to where you are now. So believe a guy’s words instead of believing in your own ability to change his mind.

          For a lot more detailed information specific to your situation, Get In-Depth Advice Now via confidential Email Exchange, or get your secret weapon in dating when you Order EGuides Today.

          Hope to help you further!

  26. jaqueline ramos permalink

    i knew my boyfriend for 6 years and we finally started talking more about our feelins i made him wait twoo months before w made it official i felt like he was the one i mean he just made me really happy . he bought me everything , he took care of me , our parents know each other and they like us as a couple i see him almost everyday . but one day we just got that temptation and had sex. after that my feelings changed towards him now i feel like my feelings are fading. like as if there was never an us i look at him and like i feel i hate him . if i were to break up with him i would be really sad but at the same time i really feel like hes not the one i want to be in a committed relationship with. why didnt i think of that before i made the choice? well simply because i didnt think of long term wise things i guess . HELP?!

    • Jaqueline,

      I wonder if there’s a deeper issue you have with sex that caused you a change of heart, to hate him all of a sudden. Do you have inhibitions about sex due to religion, culture, or the way you were brought up? Is sex taboo for you? Are you afraid of being vulnerable? Did you experience some kind of trauma related to sex in the past?

      Unless he did something to hurt you, sex should make you feel even closer and intimate with him. It should deepen your love for him. If you break up with him, it would be due to your own issues regarding sex that should be dealt with, not due to anything he has done.

      You will likely experience this change of heart again with the next guy you have sex with.

      For a lot more detailed information specific to your situation, I recommend that you to get your secret weapon in dating and relationships when you Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

      Hope to help you further!

  27. jenni twe permalink

    I loved a guy so much but we had a different culture n religion..most of the time he was busy n he wouldn’t even have time to talk to me,he often told me that we both are from different world, he can’t love me as he loved his ex gf, but do have a feeling for me..he was even scared to let me meet his family,n scared they would know about our relationship…I was just an orphan who don’t even have a parent to introduce To…when I was really about to leave him he would hold me I really don’t know what to do please help me

    • Jenni,

      If he has little time for you, if he’s too scared of the differences between your culture and religion, and if he’s too scared to introduce you to his family, then he isn’t able to be in your life as your boyfriend or husband for the future. He may have legitimate reasons to feel this way, but you want a guy who can spend time with you, love you and be with you DESPITE those differences.

      You just have to accept that he may not be the one for you. Is your love for him based on a fantasy? A yearning for love? Loneliness?

      For a lot more detailed information specific to your situation, I recommend that you to get your secret weapon in dating and relationships when you Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

      Hope to help you further!

  28. Michelle🙊 permalink

    Ive been dating this guy for 8 months now., I need some advice. My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 months now. I met his parents, he met mine, all his friends know about me, he takes me out. Basically he does everything to treat me well and he is a perfectly good and amazing boyfriend. He holds my hand in public let’s me see his phone, the works. I’m so blessed to have him.And he is 16 I am 14 and he is the best boyfriend ever.👫❤️

  29. Kylie Jones permalink

    So I’ve know this guy for 3 years now and we officially were boyfriend and girlfriend the first year and we broke up for the reason he was 18 and I was under, but we’ve pretty much been sweet on eachother and never went for anyone else. I’m really good friends with his sister and whenever I spend the night he always rushes home to see me. We go out once in a while just me and him either to the movies, dinner or he comes to my house to hang out. (He has work and goes to a jc so he’s usually busy) I’ve been 18 now for a few months and still love him and I’m going to start looking for a part time job since I’m finishing highschool and then plan to go to the jc. I really love this guy but everytime I want to talk about making “us” official again i cant come up with the right words to how I feel? And in the past he’s always said what’s going to change if we are together and idk what to say because he dosent think anything will but it will to me.. so idk I’m confused so much.. help?

    • Kylie,

      Thanks for waiting for my reply. If he can’t make it official, he doesn’t really want you. Let him know you won’t wait any longer and need to move on!

      I recommend that you to get your secret weapon in dating and relationships when you Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

  30. Jennifer Freeman permalink

    So my boyfriend and i have known each other almost 4 years just recently made it official almost a month ago when i told him that i was talking to another guy because he didnt want to make it official . When i told him he told me he didnt want me to be with another man that he wanted us to be offical. I love this man so much. He asked me the other day what i thought about marriage and would i ever get married?? Does he love me like i love him??

  31. jack permalink

    I’m a man,
    there are around 10 different types of women…most women fall into the category of women who need this advice from TheOne (u could change ur name to a more appealing one , though)

    The majority of women are the kind who have no clue about attracting a man and keeping the attraction going…when they fall for a guy they spiral down an endless ladder and lose all their power and control of the relationship, causing men to leave them or only be with them for the sex

    the advice here is quite good and helpful,..

  32. Naomi M. permalink

    Hey well i need some advice! I only know this guy a few weeks now and ive only met him a few times as he works for a local taxi company. Ever since i met him i cant stop thinking about him only to find out that my best friend also knows and likes him as he hangs out with her older sister. I dont know what to do now or wether or not to tell her, shes also kinda been going out with a few other people so i dont think she would mind. What do you think i should do?

  33. Kayly F. permalink

    I guess i also need help lol
    So i met this guy thru my parents (my parents and his aunt and uncle are friends). He had just gotten out of a 15 year old relationship w the mother of his two kids. He told me he wasnt ready for a relationship because it was too soon, he was still hurt, blah blah blah… We’ve become very close and are pretty much together, minus the official title. EVERYONE says he’s no good for me and it has become a huge issue w my parents. On new years eve my dad finally had it and asked him what did he want from me and he said “nothing. Me and he are just friends and like I’ve said before, I’m not ready for a relationship” it was extremely heart breaking and then he asked me why i put him in that position w my dad and ONCE AGAIN he asked me to just give him time. I’m completely lost. I don’t know what to do.

    • Kayly,

      There’s only one thing you can do, which is take care of yourself. You can’t do anything FOR him. There’s nothing for you to prove.

      I recommend that you to get your secret weapon in dating and relationships when you Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

  34. Taylor permalink

    I need some advice. My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 months now. I met his parents, he met mine, all his friends know about me, he takes me out. Basically he does everything to treat me well and he is a perfectly good and amazing boyfriend. He holds my hand in public let’s me see his phone, the works. I’m so blessed to have him. The only problem I have is that he didn’t change his relationship status on facebook? Not that I did but shouldn’t he do it? I didn’t put up any pictures of us on facebook, I’m waiting for him to do this. Is it not a big deal? Will he do it? How do I get him to do it? I’m confused.

    • Taylor,

      You have to tell him, “I don’t mean to pry but I notice you still haven’t changed your Facebook status. I take this as meaning you aren’t in an exclusive relationship with me. If you’re not, then I need to know so I can keep my options open.” Then see if he what he says and does.

      I recommend that you to get your secret weapon in dating and relationships when you Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

    • John permalink

      I am a guy.This is not that big of deal. Facebook causes a lot of drama and maybe he wants to avoid it.

  35. love permalink

    Ok so there is this guy whom I’ve known since 09. Never really were close untill a bout 9 months ago. He was deployed overseas and reached out to me. It was so out the blue. But we ended up talking every day from sunrise to sun down we became close, it all started maybe like a month ago came back home. We only hung out maybe 4 since he’s been back and they were the most amazing times of my life.he is honest and said he’s not ready for commitment, bc of war and don’t want to hurt me bc he don’t want to loose me….Blahh Blahh and I understand but I’m starting to fall for him, I kinda already did. He showers me and my son with gifts, and loves us both but lately he seems distant like we don’t talk everyday like we did, or see other like I want. But he tells me that he really cares about me and I’m special to him, Nd that he wouldnt do all of the stuff he does for me if he didn’t. And lied to me about having Twitter in which is stupid. But I know he still hangs with his ex he told meoe. Like I said I know we are not together but dang why do I feel like this… The breaking point to me is we talked all Christmas day long, and he called me the day after and I missed it . I returned the call and didn’t hear back from him until Tuesday(almost a week? or something like that but responded with a text. And I called him twice before within like a 3 day span. I decided to leave him alone and not text back. What should I do. Bc I care about him, but I don’t wanna be in it alone

    • Love,

      He didn’t take you out on dates. So he hung out with you instead. This means he wasn’t ready for a commitment, just like he said. He is telling you everything you need to know but you didn’t believe him and fell for him instead. You need to leave him alone and move on.

      Please get your secret weapon in dating and relationships when you Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

  36. shannen permalink

    actually i met a boy he’s nice and i was not suppose to like him i was suppose to be his friend only but his too nice and too friendly he is older than me. he is 2 yrs older than me but i believe that age doesnt matter but what matters to me the most is that i dont think he like me and i dont think if he feesl the same way i feel to him…. :’( i wish you can help me

  37. lol permalink

    I SERIOUSLY NEED HELP YOU GUYS.

    So this guy has been my best friend for like 2 months now and I don’t even know whats going on.
    At first I thought I was the one chasing him to be my friend but yesterday we hung out and he took me to the beach.
    Before we wandered off alone, this guy, he took my phone. He was my friend. He asked me to kiss him on the cheek if I wanted my phone back and so I did.
    And when we got to the beach, my best friend told me ‘so you kissed him on his cheek huh?, what about me?’. I didn’t know what to say then he was like trying to pull me towards him gently and stuff. I was like no dude I was like a but shy but I didn’t let him do It and I told him that we should go back to the guys. I feel like he likes me and I think im starting to do too. I don’t know what to do I cant stop thinking about it.
    All my friends warn me about him and they tell me that hes a player and all that but I refuse to think that way. I’m not gonna do what everyone does, that’s why I became friends with him in the first place.
    I feel like him trying to kiss me ruined a lot of shit man like he didn’t even tell me he likes me. and we are in a holiday, his dad has his phone and im leaving town in a day and I wont see him for like 2 weeks so we cant even discuss what happened but I know one out of the following things must happen.
    1- he’ll think im not interested and just back off and look for some other chick.
    2- he’ll make up a rumor in school saying that I wanted to kiss him but he didn’t let me. (highly unlikely)
    3- try even harder to get me.

    what should I do? I don’t want to lose him.

    • LOL,

      Are you sure you want to just be his friend? It’s often an easy excuse to keep a guy in your life. If you truly only thought of him as a friend, what’s wrong if he goes after someone else?

      If you’re attracted to him, you can’t be friends anymore. Or you will be hurt. Let me explain to you what you can do instead. Please Get In-Depth Advice. You can also Order EGuides Today.

      Hope to help you soon!

  38. Baps permalink

    Brim,
    Casting spells is calling on Satan. As humans we desire to control our destiny. I strongly advise against anyone doing that. True love is true love. No trickery involved. I wish you the best in your journey and hope you find true love past manipulation of those who feed off the pain of others. Wounds of the heart are profound. I do not intend and offense towards you. But I know if it didn’t work with your husband then you were and still are meant for something better. Gods grace to you.
    Blessings,
    Baps

    • Baps,

      Thanks for alerting me. That comment was supposed to go directly in my spam box. Not sure how I missed it!

      No spells allowed here!

  39. anonymous permalink

    Well a few yrs back were perfect for one another. He was even willing to drive 1200miles to come get me and bring me to where he lives. my ex baby daddy talk the talk guilt tripped me about taking his babygirl so far. and i went back to my ex. well this 3yrs later i just became single from my ex. and he has broke up with his girl friend we both became single within days of each other. this never happened before i see him once a week this i seemed to have his attention

  40. Vic permalink

    Hello umm I been on n off with same guy for 6 years we loved each other very much but sometime we don’t get along I mean we do but I guess In his way he think I don’t respect or appreciate him it really the small stuff that keep us being together we friends wit benefit I know I’m not perfect neither he is I can be cold hearted evil person that the thing I say out my mouth is rude it just out of anger I just want him to understand how I feel sometime not seek revenge but he not in my shoe sometime idk how to express myself in right way where he doesn’t think negative I just do it ask same question over and over just to make myself feel better so I don’t get hurt last night we had big fight bout it where it something I never seen him that way b4 he said he done but I’m not giving up on him is that wrong fighting for the one I want be with I was wrong I want fix everything he said he heard it all b4 but I’m serious wat should I do give him space or time where he realize idk he said he hope I change for the better like with or without him???

  41. Anonymous permalink

    I have had really bad luck with guys up until this point in my life, and especially after reading your blog, I’ve realized that I pursue guys and I push them away, so I’ve really enjoyed reading your articles!
    I was recently seeing this guy for almost 5 months. We had hooked up a few times before we started seeing each other, but it never went as far as intercourse, and he never pressured me further once I said no (one thing I guess that I did right).
    We started seeing each other on a regular basis in the summer, and he was the one to initiate hanging out 99% of the time. He’d take me out for lunch or dinner, we’d go to concerts together, study together, talk on the phone for hours, watch movies, but usually if we went out to the bar or I came over in the evening, we ended up spending the night together, but still we never had sex. I was pretty clear that I wanted to be in a relationship with him. He suggested taking it to that level a few times, and even planned a first real date once, but somehow it never went through. But he told me he didn’t plan on seeing anybody else, and he never did.
    A few months later, I ended it with him telling him that neither of us was getting what we wanted out of the arrangement, and maybe we were better off as friends. Two days later he approached me, kissed me really hard and told me he couldn’t stop thinking about me, and he couldn’t avoid the fact that we had a really strong connection, both emotionally and physically, and maybe we should finally try being in a relationship. He walked me home and we talked for a bit, and he kissed me, but we never got intimate.
    A week later we got in a really big fight. We were both drunk, and he was given the opportunity to go home with a girl at the bar. He never did, but he told his buddies he’d take her home and have sex with her if she wanted to, even though he thought she wasn’t as pretty as me and he’d rather be with me. I unfortunately got really jealous and clingy and ruined everything, and he told me he had feelings for me, but he wanted to see other people. I called the next day to apologize and said I was moving on and we should be friends, and now it’s been three months since anything has happened. I’ve dated and hooked up with other guys, but I still have strong feelings for the first guy, who is now one of my best friends, and after a couple of months of tension, he is treating me like a queen.

    Last night was my birthday and we both got very drunk, so even though I knew how I should’ve acted around him in every situation, I neglected that. I tried to kiss him, and he told me he thought I was a great friend but he didn’t feel romantically about me anymore. I was very embarrassed and thought I’d ruined our friendship again, but he held me, told me I shouldn’t feel embarrassed and it wouldn’t change anything. I still felt a little heartbroken.

    SO I basically want to know, even though it’s probably in my best interest to move on, if I have screwed this up past the point of no return, or if there’s any way for him to spark his feelings for me again, or if he will ever pursue me, and how I should handle it (clearly different than I have been in the past)

  42. peggy permalink

    We were close and I was already comfortable wit him before I found out he had a girlfriend,but they are hving a hard time den,now he says he loves me,and he wants me to be his own,I really don’t knw wht to do,becus everytime I think of leaving him,its really harder Dan I think.pls wht can I do?

    • Peggy,

      There were signs along the way that you missed. Or he hid them really well! It’s hard to leave someone you love and figure out what to do. I’d like to show you how to navigate through all of this and arrive at concrete solutions that WORK.

      For a lot more info, Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

      Hope to assist you!

      The One

  43. Guess who permalink

    There’s a guy who went out of his way to get my attention. He kept telling me that I was beautiful. Finally, I told him that he was handsome. Several times, he asked me to go out with him, but I had other plans. Finally, we went out as friends and had a great time.

    All of a sudden, the flirting escalated more and more (by him) but he would keep saying we are just friends. Now, he talks about how beautiful other women are like I’m just one of the guys. Yet, when I start to ignore him, he begins to flirt more and asks me for another night out.

    Does this guy want to date or what is going on?

    He really is my type, but if he had never asked first, I would’ve never ‘fallen’ for his attention.

    • Dear Guess Who,

      Thanks for posting.

      Sadly, that’s what happens when you decide to treat him like a friend. It just doesn’t work. He sounds like he has issues with getting close. There’s a reason you were so smitten by his attention.

      I’d love to tell you more and examine all of this more deeply, and give you constructive advice as to what to do next.

      For a lot more info, Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

      Hope to assist you!

  44. Ryan permalink

    I’m sorry but this is absolute bullshit. To a T. This is just another example of a woman confusing what she wants logically, for what she ACTUALLY wants.

    As a man, I agree that a minor chase is exciting. To an extent. If you become too elusive, show no reciprocity, I will move on…immediately. Why on God’s green earth would you want a man who is willing to wait on you hand and foot? This is a man who is needy, doesn’t have many options, and can be feminized by YOU the woman. A powerful man who can get any woman he wants, will. I don’t care if you’re “classy”, or “hard to get” because you’re not. I know for a fact, that any woman will fall to her knees immediately for the right man. And if you don’t, that man will be gone…and for good reason. If you try to make him chase you for too long, and confuse him, he will be gone. Men call those other men little bitches, and for good reason. You’re now another dog on this girls leash. She has complete control of you. She has taking a masculine role in the relationship, and has essentially cut off your balls. Most smart men take this as a bad sign, and get the out.

    How the hell is this attractive to a woman? When a girl has you at her fingertips, she will walk all over you. If she can so easily change the shift of power, how can you protect her?

    It is logical, don’t get me wrong. But it is not what ANY of you actually want, and if you say you do….I call bullshit. Whenever one of my buddies chases after a girl, and showers her with attention and gifts, she loses interest in him. Whenever one of my buddies shows no interest, while not ignoring the girl, he ends up getting that girl. I appreciate your attempt at explaining how to get a boyfriend. But this is wrong. Oh so wrong.

    • thats funnny but so true i know this and im a female but dont get me wrong i was going to fall for this im pretty gulable even when i know the truth

    • Rachel permalink

      I totally agree with Ryan. I read this and was like uh what? Never initiate?? And what is up with the don’t reciprocate til he has paid for 3 dates? Who made that stupid rule? That is ridiculous! It is not about making him pay or suffer. It is about meeting someone and having that connection. If you want to call him just to hear his voice do it!! Don’t do it every two seconds but if you like him let him know. If he feels the same he will let you know, if he doesn’t then it wasn’t meant to be! There aren’t rules when it comes to meeting the right guy or girl. If you find yourself playing these little “games” then you have NOT found the right one. If he/she is the right one you can be yourself and he will love you regardless. Guys want the same things we want- to be loved, desired, wanted, respected and cherished. They may not all show it but they do. For gods sake people they have hearts too!! Don’t string a guy along and play hard to get. Now that doesn’t mean forget your friends and hobbies and answer his texts in 2 seconds etc. Continue to be you but include him in your life so he knows he’s important to you. If you don’t show him how will he know? You can’t build a bond and a strong relationship by pretending not to care and always being busy. And yes I get that it says you can do this at one point- however there is no hard set date to start-like after 3 crap- it is when you feel it!! And as for us being the prize catch? Everyone is a prize to someone and you shouldn’t need to alter the way you think, feel or react to make someone see that. The right person sees it immediately. If he loves you he loves you- no amount of games and chasing will make him love you. It’s either there or it isn’t.

      • Dee permalink

        @Rachel

        No one is asking you to follow The Ones advice and I have read her blog and majority of her comments and to me, it all makes sense. From what I have gotten from them, I can summarize her points for you to understand her message because from what you wrote, you clearly don’t understand it at all.

        1) A man who doesn’t ask you out on a date is NOT interested in you romantically. He may be interested in having sex with you or being friends but until he asks you out on a date, he hasn’t shown any signs of interest.

        2) When you give attention e.t.c call, hangout, text, respond to texts, have sex (especially) with a man who hasn’t shown interest in being with you exclusively, you are giving your heart for nothing and at the end of the day, you end up with nothing while you long to be more because you either end up being a booty call to him, a friend, text buddy, sex buddy, FWB and the list goes on.

        3) When you constantly respond to his messages with no dates in sight, you start falling for the attention, the sweet words his says to you and at the end you have no date because he already has you, knows you and therefore has no reason to pursue you (as in taking you out on dates).

        4) The main reason why she advices people on this site as she does is so you can “Sleep like a princess” not having to wonder if he likes you or not or why he is doing this or why he isn’t doing that; and to protect your heart against those men who have no intention of dating you but just texting you, calling you and wasting your precious time.

        Now I would like you to answer this for me, Who shows more interest, a guy who texts you constantly with no dates planned or a guy who texts you all the time to plan dates?

        You said “If you want to call him just to hear his voice do it!! Don’t do it every two seconds but if you like him let him know.”

        When you say don’t call him every two seconds, why shouldn’t you? Who really made up that ridiculous rule? After all, if your heart says call him NOW why shouldn’t you since you aren’t “playing any games”?

        But its common sense that if you call him every two seconds you risk appearing DESPERATE and OBSESSED. So you don’t do it.

        And that is the exact reason why you don’t

        1) Pursue a man
        2) Have sex without a commitment
        3) Give him all your time and attention and so forth.

        You said “Don’t string a guy along and play hard to get” I can guarantee no where does The One ever say you should “string a man along”

        It’s mostly the man stringing a woman along when he always texts but never asks her out!

        You said “Continue to be you but include him in your life so he knows he’s important to you. If you don’t show him how will he know?”

        You show him he is important to you by making time to see him out of your BUSY schedule WHEN he asks you out on a date.

        LISTEN and don’t waste your time on men who do not pursue you. Men may say they like being pursued but at the end of the day, they want what they WANT and they go after just that. They want to CHOOSE their woman, and they definitely do not want to be the on being hunted no matter what they say. It’s ego boosting for a while, but then they wonder what’s wrong with a woman that she now has to take on the masculine role of being the hunter.

        A great advice from me:
        LET MEN CHOOSE YOU AND THEN PICK FROM THOSE MEN THE ONE YOU WANT.

        The One, please keep on writing and giving advice. It has helped me and I’m very sure countless of women as well. You are very much appreciated.

        • Rachel's permalink

          Haha someone takes offense when someone has a different opinion then them!! Honestly hon read my post. I said nothing about doing all the chasing. I said don’t play games and make him suffer. It’s a mutual thing. I never said text a guy who doesn’t ask you out lol. I understand completely what “The One” is saying- I just don’t agree with it. I never once said to talk, text ,call or give a guy the time of day if he doesn’t put forth the effort. What I said is don’t follow some rules about 3 days date and never initaiting. A relationship is supposed to be a two way street. Furthermore the comment was not directed at you so calm down!! I never said you have to follow my or anyone else’s advice. Just my opinion which last time I checked is my right to give. Sorry but I agree with the GUY who commented because in reality they are the ones who know whether they like or don’t like that behavior. If a guy isn’t interested and doesn’t put forth an effort- go your own way. But if he does there is no reason to follow some rules about when or not to call text etc. As far as what I said about every 2 seconds- if you read I also said Dont forget yourself. But not calling or initaiting at all is just silly. Try not to take such offense to other people’s opinions.

          • I don’t think Dee was taking offense at all. She was just informing you what works! If it takes you to play hard to get the guy to treat you well and cherish you, then that’s what women have to do. It’s completely up to you.

            You said, “Sorry but I agree with the GUY who commented because in reality they are the ones who know whether they like or don’t like that behavior.”

            Sure, but a guy might like you to have his babies without a commitment from him.

            Look, men look out for themselves. Don’t even think for a second they do what they do to make things easy for you.

            Being a prize catch isn’t easy. It takes tremendous discipline. Passing your math exam is probably easier.

            • Rachel's permalink

              Really? Men only look out for themselves and we have to play hard to get to make them cherish us?? Pretty sure that is a blanket stereotype. And as
              For informing me of what works?!? Sorry but Not this girl. All I did was be myself and my husband loves me. That’s what relationships are about. Playing hard to get is a game- hence the term “playing”. Good luck to all ladies and men- dating isn’t easy but the best advice to follow is always Be Yourself. That’s my final answer :) Have a Merry Christmas and good luck!

            • Sara permalink

              yes! men look out for themselves!! This is so important to remember. If you aren’t on the list of things he’s really willing to work for…guess what?? He won’t work for you…but he will take advantage of you. Listen to One Truth…this advice is priceless!

        • Hi Dee,

          Thanks for posting! You have excellent understanding of the material. When you can teach it to others, guess what? You’ve GOT IT.

  45. Sally permalink

    I love your blog !!!
    I have a question , I met someone who seems to like me from the list you have in this post , now he got my number yet didn’t ask for date , should I make any insinuation , like with humor ,to push him to invite me as he seems insecure and I am kind of cold with him in general ;) thanks !

    • Dear Sally,

      Thanks for reading!

      A guy who gets your number doesn’t indicate he will call you. It raises the possibility, but it is not a guarantee. Therefore, let him decide if he wants to see you. Don’t decide for him.

      I wonder why you’re cold with him in general if you’re interested in going out with him?

      For a lot more info, Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

      Hope to assist you!

      The One

  46. Eternal flame permalink

    Would you be able to do a blog post about re-igniting a relationship that has lost its spark and how to get your man to be super interested in you again if he has stopped making an effort?

    • Eternal Flame,

      You can’t get a man to be interested in you again. That’s his call. You are only in control of your own actions, which is to be a Prize Catch, the best you can be, with no expectations. So if he doesn’t think you’re the cat’s meow, you keep moving on and don’t give him a backward glance.

      For a lot more info, Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

      Hope to assist you some day!

  47. NinaNina permalink

    OMG. I just have to share this beautiful article that I’ve read from the page Inner Bonding:

    Title: Is This Love or Emotional Dependency?

    One of my clients, whose ex-girlfriend recently broke up with him, asked me the following question:

    “I think I still love her, but is this love or just emotional dependency? Many times I ask myself if falling in love comes from the wounded self because (for me at least) it feels as if I can’t live without the other person. When I give love from the heart, I don’t expect anything back, but when I ‘fall in love’ I think this is a different energy.”

    Falling in love can come from two different inner states. When you fall in love from the wounded self – the ego self – you are in love with how the other person loves you. You are handing over to the other person the responsibility for your self-worth and wellbeing, and if he or she does a good job of attending to you in the way you want to be attended to, then you may say you are “in love.” However, it is not so much the person you love, but how he or she loves you. When it feels as if you can’t live without the other person, it is emotional dependency. The part of you that is “in love” is really a child or adolescent who is needy for love because you are not giving love to yourself or to others. There is an emptiness inside that you expect someone else to fill, because you are not taking responsibility for your own feelings of self-worth. You are attaching your worth to another’s love, which is why you can’t live without that person.

    When you fall in love as a loving adult, instead of as a wounded, needy child or adolescent, your need for the relationship is totally different. As a loving adult, you have learned – through the consistent practice of Inner Bonding – how to fill yourself with love and define your own worth. Instead of needing someone to fill you and make you feel lovable and worthy, you already feel worthy and full of love. You experience this inner fullness because you have learned how to take full responsibility for your own feelings and needs, and you have learned to fill yourself with love from a spiritual source. This fullness overflows and you want to share this love with another person, another loving adult who is also filled with love. Your desire is to share love rather than to get love.

    The kind of person you will pick will be totally different when a loving adult is choosing, than when your wounded self is choosing. The people we pick have a similar level of woundedness and a similar level of emotional health. Obviously, the more you have done your Inner Bonding work to bring love within, and the more you have learned to take loving care of yourself, the more you will be attracted to someone who also does this.

    When you pick someone from your wounded self, you will pick someone whom you believe wants the job of filling you up. The problem is that the other person may be attempting to fill you up in the hopes that you will also fill up him or her. Two people who each want to get love rather than share love will eventually find themselves very disappointed with each other. They will each blame the other for not loving them in the way they want to be loved. When relationships break up, it is often because one or both partners are not taking responsibility for their own feelings and self-worth and are blaming the other for their resulting unhappiness.

    If you are so attached to someone that you feel you can’t live without that person, try learning to give to yourself and others what it is you want from this person. Your job is to become the person to yourself that you want the other person to be. Then you will be able to be “in love” rather than “in need.” You will be able to love another person for who he or she is, rather than for what this person can do for you. Instead of needing to get love, you can give love from the heart for the joy of it, and feel filled in the giving.

    • Nina,

      Everything you said is so true! The wounded self is not coming from a place of self-worth. I always advise people fresh out of a relationship to take some time off and examine what happened and why, without blame, so they can heal those wounds with self-love and nurturing. That’s a place of true power!

      Thank you for sharing this.

  48. Jennifer permalink

    Women’s should it not give there cookies on till 90 days a man has to work hard to get the cookie !!!

    1. Don’t chase a man if a man wants you he will chase you !! Believe me :)

    2. Don’t call him everyday ! That push him away !! So you don’t want that girl

    3. Mans doesn’t want a easy women

    4. Show him that you’re different from other women he talking to ! play a little hard to get !!

    See there one a thing you can’t change a man.If a man is a player then get a other man who can treats you better with respect ! Us woman have the power to pick the man we want in our life !

  49. Jennifer permalink

    Me and this guy met on Facebook September 21 we been talking he keep asking me questions he was trying to know me and I was asking him questions to get to know him as will. Then later he starts asking me if I have a boyfriend And I said no Then I ask him to you have a girlfriend he said no So after those silly questions then mean him started to video chat on Skype. We started talking on 90 looking each other and going each other kisses but nothing serious is going on. After the video chat he started sending me pictures of his family And he wants me to meet them And I said yes… He wants to meet my parents as well. So I Said to myself so many question I think this guy wants something serious with me.. He asked for my number and my phone was disconnected sene he sent me a message on Facebook saying that he was calling me.i was so in shot When he first told me about the calling I knew that he was interesting in me :) we talk about everything’s books careers goals in life Even he ask me how many kids I want at the moment I said too kids and he said the same..so right now is december 11 2013 we still talking but not dating :( I’m going to see him in person and see where this is going to go

    • Dear Jennifer,

      Thanks for posting on my blog! That’s a lot of back and forth online and there are concrete steps a guy needs to make to make dating happen with you.

      Social media and Skype are technologies that can disrupt the dating rituals very easily, so you need to know when and how to use them to your advantage. I’d love to show you how!

      For a lot more info, Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

      Hope to assist you!

      The One

  50. Jane permalink

    Ive been dating this guy for 5 months now., we have talk about making our relationship official several times but its always at a wrong timing. I mean, he asked me if i wanted to make it official and i told him “soon” then when i was ready to step up for a relationship, he answered the same thing to me.. “Soon” so after few months, i told him that i want our relationship to be official but he asked me if im ready, and i said yes. But after that, he said asked him about making it official in person and we shall see what happens. Is it a good idea for me to ask him about that? What should i do?

    • Dear Jane,

      Thank you for posting! Let me ask, who brought up this topic FIRST? It matters, because whoever brings it up first is the one more interested in it.

      I’d like to show you how to address this issue with him WITHOUT pressuring him or scaring him away, and freeing you from any expectation from him once and for all. These are tried and true secrets.

      For a lot more info, Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

      Hope to assist you!

      The One

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