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Are you letting men chase you?

July 23, 2013

If you are, BRAVO and CONGRATULATIONS.

If you aren’t, you are in the right place, so please explore all the articles on this blog.

But no matter if you are being chased or are the chaser, tell me about your experiences!

Pick a topic below and comment!

  • Are you a chaser? Does it work for you and why?
  • What do you think you’ve done wrong in the past and how are you doing things right today?
  • Does being a challenge work?
  • Have you always been a PRIZE CATCH? Why or why not?
  • You like some guy. Is he pursuing you? Why do you think he isn’t?
  • What have you learned from letting men chase you?
  • Are you having difficulty meeting men? Why do you think that is?
  • Self-worth…Do you have it and what are you doing to feel it and get it?
  • Anything you want to say!

Get the secret weapon in dating and relationships when you Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

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45 Comments
  1. The One,

    Yes, this guy im seeing has wined and dined me for 2 occasions. But the remainder of the total of our meetings, he has settled on going dutch w me or paying for the 70% of the tab. I am concerned because I know for a fact that it is a good indicator if a man pays. This guy is exerting effort in the way that he visits me at work everyday and constantly texts me. In short, he is pursuing me. But this one thing concerns me. I get this awful feeling every time a guy I’m dating doesn’t treat me. I feel undeserving of a man’s love although I am 100% financially independent but it really pays to have a man to wine and dine you. I want to know how to reverse this situation.

    Pls do help me out on this. Thanks!

    • A,

      How a man spends money on you is noteworthy. Since he did not pay for the third date entirely, you had the choice to stop seeing him. However, because you continued seeing him again after he went dutch on you, you are letting him know you are fine with how he is treating you.

      At this point, I don’t know if you can reverse the situation. Generally speaking, a guy should develop feelings for you more and more as he sees you more and more often, and thus be willing to continue spending money on you. When he spends less and less, that means he either thinks he’s got you in the bag or he isn’t as interested as you think or hope he is.

      Reciprocation is important too, but it is done after the third date he has paid for, not the second — to make sure a guy is invested. Please get the “When & How to Reciprocate” EGuide because it will show you the importance of reciprocation, the exact timing for it, and how to do it in a way that keeps him interested without making him take you for granted. It’s always a fine line!

      Just be aware you ultimately have to accept a guy as he is, if he prefers to share the costs of dates or whatnot. It is your call as far as whether you are still willing to see him if he does prove to be that. But after reading the EGuide, I think it will be clearer to you.

  2. NinaNina permalink

    “Let there be spaces in your togetherness, and let the winds of the heavens dance between you. Love one another but make not a bond of love: Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls. Fill each other’s cup but drink not from one cup. Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf. Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone, even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music. Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping. For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts. And stand together, yet not too near together: For the pillars of the temple stand apart, and the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow.” — Khalil Gibran

  3. Marie permalink

    Well here it goes…a co-worker and I have always been interested. We actually went out four years ago on and off for a year. We finally went separate ways because he never wanted anything serious. That he couldn’t offer me marriage as he had gotten out of a 12 year marriage, he was divorced a year I think. I knew this yet hoped like a retard. Anyways, he went his way and I went mine. He ended up dating someone for a year and I dated others.

    During these past four years, he still manages to come around to chit chat about nothing really and ask how I am doing. We work in separate departments. Our work never crosses paths, we are even on separate floors. He never formally asks me out on a date. Last year, he asked me to coffee, which took me by surprise. The whole time it was about me. He asked how I was, how my mom was, what I was up to, what I am doing on the weekends and on and on. He then told me his mom tells him he needs to settle down. I told him you should. That I am sure you can find a nice lady. After that, he suggested coffee again, weeks later but never followed up. So I asked about it, he said he it is too busy and he has to clean his house. That he had his kids these past couple weekends and have not had a time. After I heard that I stopped talking him in general and told him not to talk to me. He looked miserable during this time. He only lasted a month and a half and went back to talking to me.

    So time passed and he still kept coming down to say hi and chit chat and stop me in the halls when he saw me. Now I am at the point where I don’t care. He is just there. He comes in everyday into the break room to say hi when I am eating. I don’t even know how he knows I am there. I engage in conversation and laugh and actually enjoy his conversation. It’s like he can’t stay away and I don’t know why. His interest is apparent as he now touches me (non-sexually) of course, laughs a lot and always finds a reason to talk. I take it as a grain of salt as he does not and I doubt will ever pursue even though a part of me wants him to. I do not seek him or chase him. I know very well he is not pursuing. He is just there.

    Any suggestions?

    • Marie,

      He doesn’t need to ask you out on a date because he gets to see you and talk to you at work. So if you want to see if he will step up, disappear into a pile of papers or lock your office door. Zip past him without saying hi. See if he misses you and takes you out. If he doesn’t, he is simply a bored man who likes you enough to chat but not enough to date.

      For a lot more detailed information specific to your situation, feel free to get your secret weapon in dating and relationships when you Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

      Hope to help you further!

  4. Clueless permalink

    I’m a 41 yr old single mom. One of my daughters is autistic. I’m so lonely, and have been single for 15 years since my divorce. I feel like I just don’t know how to date. I don’t know when or if, I’m suppose to call. He was doing all the calling at first. He lives 6 hours away, and I’ve been talking to him for hours at a time. He is a good friend of 30 years to a family member, and I haven’t seen him since I was young. I feel like we have a lot on common. I called him the last two times, over a week ago, and since I haven’t gotten a call since, I have to assume he no longer has an interest, but this happens to me frequently. I can’t figure out if I’m saying or doing something wrong, or if I’m just not fabulous enough to warrant dealing with a woman with a special needs kid whose future is uncertain. The older I get, the lonelier I feel.

    • Clueless,

      Dating is not easy when you’ve been out of the loop for so long, and even harder if you don’t know how important it is to be a Prize Catch and eliminate time-wasters.

      He did all the calling at first because he was interested. When he stopped, it was because he lost interest. Why did he lose interest? It looks like because you let him get to know you for hours and hours, and when you overdose a man with who you are, he has no chance to develop his feelings slowly and deeply. He is pressured to make a decision about you, and he’d rather back off than go forwards.

      Letting him access you so easily also allowed him to find fault. When you give away too much information so soon, he will easily find something he dislikes. It may have something to do with finding out you have an autistic child, or it may not. But if that was what turned him off, you don’t want him anyway. Good riddance!

      You ARE fabulous enough. But being fabulous is not the same thing as being a Prize Catch, which is something men seek and cherish for keeps.

      You CAN learn how to navigate the minefields of dating. Lots of women have and succeeded, by practicing the principles of self-worthiness in Prize Catch behavior. You can too!

      For a lot more detailed information specific to your situation, I recommend that you to get your secret weapon in dating and relationships when you Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

      Hope to help you further!

  5. Cindy permalink

    I’ve been talking to a guy for awhile and we went on our first date this past Tuesday. I waited for awhile for him to ask me out, but he didn’t so I initiated the first date. We had a great time. He texted me when he got home and said that it was good seeing me and that he had a nice time. I understand that it was a general comment and that their are no guarantees so I didn’t read too much into it. I texted him back and thanked him for the dinner and movie and that I had a good time too. I wasn’t expecting a call or text too soon to set up a second date. I agree that both parties should take some time to reflect on the first date to decide if that’s someone they would like to see again. I’ve also heard of 2 day and 3 day rules but I know that everyone is different so you can’t go by that. He knows that I’ll be starting back school in two weeks so I would imagine he would try to take me out before I start school since I will be busy. It will be one week tomorrow, and I haven’t heard from him again. Just to give you background info, he was in school all last year getting his masters. He inquired about me through a friend and agreed to go out. We exchanged numbers over the summer. I tried to be patient and wait for him to ask my out, but he he didn’t. He reached out to me one night and that’s when I found out he was in summer school and he was graduating Fall 13′. So I gathered that was the reason for him not asking me out. Well I did initiate most of the contact with him over the summer and I did that because I was trying to drop hints about going out so he could actually step up but it didn’t work. So the summer ended with no date locked in and we really didn’t talk that much last semester because at that point I was busy with school too. Since I initiated the first date I have been doing some reflecting and I did decide that at this point, he has to initiate the second date. I know that in order to know if he is truly interested in me, I have to let him reach out to me. So like I said it’s basically been a week so there is still hope, but I am not going to contact him. If he wants me, he will happily ask me for a second date.

    • Cindy permalink

      Btw, when talking about relationships, he did mention that he wanted to focus on school last year, so it made sense as to that’s why he didn’t ask me out. Eventhough I know some people would think that that’s not a good excuse and if he wanted to he could have

      • That’s another way of him saying, “I’m not interested in you even though it was nice knowing you.” So don’t talk to a guy about relationships, unless he’s asking you to be his girlfriend.

    • Cindy,

      When you initiated, you let him know you don’t need him to ask you out because you’ll do the work for him. So he accepted that and went along for the ride. Yes, let him initiate the second date, and never pay attention to a guy UNLESS he is asking you out. Otherwise, he’s just a guy who is talking to you. There are NO HIDDEN MEANINGS behind that.

      Only deal with what is overtly seen or heard. Don’t speculate.

      For a lot more detailed information specific to your situation, I recommend that you to get your secret weapon in dating and relationships when you Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.
      Hope to help you further!

  6. suum permalink

    Wow, I feel like I’ve finally found the right place for dating advice! Everything you say really clicks with my experiences. I feel so empowered by your simple rules and I know that they will help me weed out the losers and zero-in on the kind of man I’m looking for.

    I wish I’d seen your blog 8 months ago as it could have saved me so much pain, wasted time and wasted money. I did ABSOLUTELY EVERY SINGLE THING wrong and it ended badly and I hated myself for months afterward. All of that misery could have been avoided if I’d been given the advice I’m reading here. I’ve since recovered most of my self-esteem, but my feelings are still raw and I’ve become suspicious of all men’s intentions. I don’t want to become bitter!

    Fortunately, I’ve just met another man who seems interested and, more importantly, I also found your blog! I’ve already done a couple of things wrong with this new guy, but maybe there’s still a chance: He caught up with me after class two nights ago and suggested we should “hang out some time” and I smiled and said “yeah, that would be cool…” MISTAKE!! …and then we stood there silently for a little while and then I said “…so do you want my number?”…MISTAKE!! Then he texted me the next day to say “hi” and I continued the messaging, which went nowhere…MISTAKE!! I know he’s shy, but that’s no excuse for not making a date because he already knows I’m open to seeing him. I just have to remember to stay cool from now on and be myself.

    I’m excited because I’m sure that if I follow all your rules I won’t sit around fretting about whether he likes me or what to do or say because it won’t matter. His thoughts are irrelevant, I only have to worry about his actions. I have better things to do than waste more time on lazy, wishy-washy men who send mixed messages. You have given me hope! Thank you!

    Now I have a question: You say that he should pick me up for dates, but he doesn’t own a car. Many people in this city don’t, since parking is such a nightmare and public transit is quite convenient. Would it still a bad idea to meet him at the date location? If so, what’s the solution? This will be a common issue with dating men in this area. Thank you for any advice.

    • Dear Suum,

      Glad you are reading my blog! A guy should pick you up no matter what, unless you met him online and need to protect yourself. He needs to come to you and take you to the venue.

      For a lot more info, Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

      Hope to assist you!

      The One

  7. Hi, and thanks for your blog. I am a single mom and recently someone I see occasionally has shown some interest in me. Initially I didn’t consider him as a potential suitor, we just had a conversation. I wondered why he had dropped other responsibilities to chat with me, but didn’t think much about it beyond that. He kind of asked me to this party thing, but it was too last minute for me to plan to go. I also didn’t think of it as a date invitation. Anyway, since then, I’ve seen him maybe 3 times? Each time there’s been something interesting that’s happened. I think the second time I met his dad, who talked with me for a while. The third time I saw him, I was with my daughter and her friend. He initiated conversation with me, and would have stayed to chat longer, but someone needed him to do something so he had to go. This last time I saw him, I guess the 4th time, I was with a friend and our daughters. When he saw me, he waved, and I smiled back at him. He disappeared for just a minute and during that time, my friend and I were leaving. I forgot something on my way out (not on purpose!) and to my surprise, he rushed outside to return it to me. He spoke to my friend, and then as she walked to her car, we chatted a little while longer. He invited me to this Thanksgiving thing with some of his friends, and I accepted. When I asked him when it was, he pulled something out that I thought was a phone and I thought he was going to ask for my number. He pulled out his card and said to call him. The next day, I texted him so he would have my number. Initially I just said, “Hey its so and so from last night”. I tried really hard to not have a conversation with him… and we really didn’t. It has just been awkward small talk over the past couple days. I’m not really sure what to expect or if I’ve done something wrong at this point. Please advise!

    • Petite Princesse,

      Welcome to the blog! Thanks for posting your situation. I see a lot of things you did that I wouldn’t recommend.

      For a lot more info, Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

      With Email Exchange, you can tell me more. I can address more questions and concerns, and explore anything else that might help you to get a better grip of what is going on. I think you will get a lot out of it, just like others have!

      Hope you consider doing this so I can advise you exactly know what to do, what went wrong, and how you can make it right. Look forward to hearing from you, Petite Princesse.

      INVEST IN YOU.

  8. Ashley permalink

    I don’t think I like it when men chase me. They seem so weak, nervous, or fake. I think I try to stop it if they do it because I feel uncomfortable with them being that way towards me. It’s like I want to take them out of their misery or maybe my misery. I actually don’t think I have had a guy pursue me and it actually feels good. Have you ever heard this from a woman before?

    • When you start feeling good about yourself, you won’t ever be uncomfortable when a man chases you. You’ll accept his compliments and be flattered. Why? Because you agree with him completely that he is right, you ARE worth his investment and effort!

      You give him full approval of his actions!

      • Ashley permalink

        Hmmmm….I look forward to the day I feel that way.
        Thank you!

  9. Dina permalink

    I have a question again TheOne, i just want to make sure i get it right. So you are saying, it’s all start at the beginning. And you cannot do anything wrong since the start, because then if you do “chase” or step ahead before him, then you screw and never know his real intention. Am i right? I see so many women initiate conversation or smiling first or be in a guy’s path for a purpose so that he will chases her. What’s the boundaries? I also learn from you not to focus on one guy, unless that he asks you to be his gf exclusively. However, how about if he is the only guy that ask you out? I mean some girls don’t have the luxury of being chased by 3 different guys at the same time. Any thought? How not to be so focused on one? I find this to be my weakness in the past even i have other things to think of. Any suggestion?

  10. May permalink

    Q: Does being a challenge work?

    A: Yes. My tactic is to operate a push-and-pull system. When he pushes (he buys me flowers) I pull (after thanking him I arrange another date) but if he doesn’t push (he acts cold, aloof or unresponsive) I pull (I remain cool and level-headed by getting on with life). It’s not about mirroring the other persons behaviour but ensuring that there is a 50/50 shared effort towards making the relationship work – this particularly works well at the start of a relationship when one person is most likely to make most of the effort,

  11. How do i get self worth? I feel i am overweight, but when i was skinny guys never asked me out anyways, i just feel so ugly. I live in the US, but when i travel to other countries, guys like me more outside this country, but when im here i just feel so ugly. I feel its because im brown skinned and not white or asian or light-skinned that i dont get any numbers or any responses on my online dating profile, & when i do get any type of response i pursue them and get rejected accordingly because of my pursuit. Im close to 30 and the doctors tell me i have till the age o 37-40 to keep my ovaries, shall i move overseas? Shall i move to an area where im more attractive to men? What can i do? Im sorry this is a very self-pity rant, its just really hard to follow ur advice, what advice do u have for girls that are brown skinned and not viewed as attractive in this society?

    • May permalink

      “How do i get self worth? I feel i am overweight, but when i was skinny guys never asked me out anyways, i just feel so ugly.”

      You lack self-confidence. Men will flock towards you if you become self-confident. Self-confidence comes from being happy with who you are. The media creates a false impression of what men are actually attracted to i,e. skinny and extremely beautiful (with the help of photoshop) women. Men love confident women because confident women love themselves and they make men feel lucky to be with them.

      You may find that working on your self-esteem will help you become more attractive so spending time on enhancing your inner and outer beauty. For example, take on a few hobbies, like salsa dancing, which will allow you to meet people and to manage your weight or get involved in community activities.

      The last thing you want to NOT do is come across as desperate. Whether that be desperate for a husband or desperate for a father for your unborn children. Men can sense desperate women very easily. By working on your self-esteem you’ll quickly find your attention diverted from men to other things and it’s then, and only then, that you’ll notice men becoming drawn to you.

    • K,

      Don’t let your weight or skin color make you believe you are less than. Always focus on the inner you that is forever beautiful and worthy and deserving.

      Not everyone succeeds in online dating. You’re not alone. It’s not for everyone, so do something else instead. Meet men in person by socializing in different activities.

      Don’t panic, and like May articulated so well, don’t be desperate. Women are having kids in their forties so relax. Focus on finding your self-worth, because that counts for everything. EVERYTHING.

      Yes, go where you’re welcome and appreciated. Move. Change jobs. Find new places to socialize and participate in new activities.

      I am a firm believer that everyone has a competitive edge, and you must find the right market where you will be desired and sought after. It does exist!

  12. Anonymous permalink

    I HAVE TWO MEN CHASIN ME THAT I BARLEY GIVE THE TIME OF DAY 2 I LET THEM KNOW IN A WAY NOT INTERESTED BUT EVERY NOW AND THEN I HIT WITH A TX TO SAY HEY I DON’T LIKE TO BE IGNORED SO I KNOW HOW IT FEELS BUT JUST NOT INTERESTED IN THEM DUDES THEN THERES TS MM MM MM 1 MAN THAT I AM CHASING WE MAY SEE EACH OTHER 2X A MONTH HE STAYS A DAY OR TWO WITH ME AND AFTER THE GREATEST NIGHT OF SEX IN MY LIFE I TOLD HIM TO COME WHEN EVER HE WANTED IT CAN BE DAYS THAT I DON’T HEAR FROM HIM AND HE WILL JUST SHOW UP..AND I ALWAYS WELCOME HIM WITH OPEN ARMS HE IS RECENTLY DIVORCED AND I KNOW HE DOS’NT WANT A COMMITMENT BUT NEITHER DO I I JUST DON’T WANT TO BE IGNORED WHEN I TRY TO CONTACT HIM A DAY OR TWO AFTER HE LEAVES HE USUALLY RESPONSES MUCH LATER SAYING HE NOT ALWAYS ON FB THE ONLY CONTACT I HAVE WITH ;HIM IS ON FB. WHEN WE ARE TOGETHER WE ALWAYS HAVE A GOOD TIME TALKING LAUGHING WATCHING MOVIES AND SOMETIMES WE DON’T EVEN HAVE SEX WE JUST BE CUDDLING AND KISSING HE MAKES ME FEEL SPECIAL..I DON’T WANT TO HOLD HIM UP ON FB BUT WHEN I SAY HEY OR WHATS UP HE HARDLY RESPONSES THEN I START TO GET PISSED OFF CUSS HIM OUT THEN HES ALL WHY U BUGGIN WE GOOD…..OH ALMOST FORGOT IM LIKE 12 YRS OLDER THEN HIM I WANT TO LET GO BUT HE REALLY MELTS ME AND MAKES ME VERY MOIST WHEN I EVEN THINK OF HIM IM TRYING TO LEAN BACK BUT AS SOON AS HE HITS ME UP OR COMES OVER I JUST SAY HEY AND SMILE I LOVE THE SURPRISE VISITS BUT ITS TO MUCH MY FEELINGS ARE GROWING STRONGER AND I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO PLEASE HELP

    • Thanks for posting a while back on my dating blog.

      If you need private advice from me, please sign up at Get In-Depth Advice Now for confidential Email Exchange.

      Hope to assist you one day!

      The One

  13. Thank you so much for your advice. I’ll never forget that I’m a prize catch or that I’m worth pursuing.

  14. Never mind about the post above. I just found out that he’s not the right guy for me. Sorry for the trouble & good luck to all of the ladies out there looking for love. I’m just glad I found out sooner rather than later! I am going to go back to being single and happy. And ladies also remember, NEVER compromise your beliefs for a man. Your intuition knows best. If he’s not the right one, you’ll know it. Thanks for listening to this rant and I hope you all have an amazing week.

  15. Alyssa Salcido permalink

    Hi. I saw this website last night and I knew it was what I was looking for this entire time! I’ve chased men throughout my whole life and it’s never ended well. I’m wondering what I should do about this one guy. I liked him at first but now I’m not so sure about my feelings for him because I’m not sure if he’s chasing me or if I’m chasing him. We’ve talked twice now. The first time the conversation was great; we seemed to really be getting along. Then we talked again and he said that he was a cheerleader. That turned me off immediately. After that he kind of ignored me because class was starting and he just started talking to his friends. It’s kind of hard to tell if he’s interested or not because we have this very short period of time to talk and then students start coming in for class, so I guess there’s not really a chance. Anyway, for whatever reason, I don’t think he’s exactly pursuing me. But do I need to give it more time? I’ve only known him for a month or so and I haven’t exactly given him a chance until now. What I do know is that if we had more time to talk, would he act any differently? Would he even show interest? I’m not sure. I don’t know if I should keep trying to see if he’ll pursue me or just give up on him altogether. Thanks so much for any advice you can give. I really appreciate it and I absolutely love your advice. I’m keeping this website as my dating reference guide from now on.

  16. Just me permalink

    Hi The One!

    Great blog with great advice – thank you!!!

    I have a question for you about letting men chase you: When does giving them distance become rude? A man I just met emails me a lot, and I wait at least one day to respond, but emailing is becoming a common ritual between dates. I don’t want to keep up the between-date conversations, but I feel rude ignoring questions from him about my life and about what I’m up to. I also feel rude if I don’t respond sooner than 24 hours after he writes or if I don’t ask him questions back. Do you think a man will feel insulted and lose interest if I don’t get back to him? Or if I wait a few days? I really like this man, and he’s very polite and accomplished, and don’t want to seem flaky or inconsiderate.

    A quick question about another man who I like, but am not as interested in as the emailer because of this man’s romantic situation: If he has a long-term girlfriend, but hasn’t told me about her, should I still accept his invitations to spend time with him? I like him quite a bit, and if it weren’t for his girlfriend, I would be very excited about him. I don’t know his intentions, so should I assume he wants to be friends (he’s very nice and introduces me to people in his social circle)? Or should I treat him like any other suitor? I wouldn’t let the relationship advance to anything serious or physical because of his girlfriend, and I will likely put him in the friend zone in my mind to avoid getting hurt, but I guess I still want to be desirable in his mind in case he decides (independently) to leave his relationship.

    Thank you sooo much for your time if you’re able to respond to these questions!!! You’re amazing.

    • Welcome to the blog! Thanks for reading.

      It’s not rude of you to wait 24 hours before replying to his emails or ignore them if they are impertinent. Women with high esteem of themselves , who know how to be a PRIZE CATCH, find it easy to do. If you treasure your time and know your worth, you will not fear losing his interest.

      In fact, there is no PROOF of interest if he isn’t asking you out on a date. So without proof, there should be even LESS incentive for you to respond to his emails.

      A man doesn’t always think the way women do. He won’t be insulted, he’ll be INTRIGUED, which is where you want him anyway.

      For a lot more info, I urge you to Order EGuides Today, or Get Personalized Advice via confidential Email Exchange.

      Hope to assist you!

  17. misha permalink

    Oh thanks for the new things…. I write you from Italy…

    I did all wrong in the past
    I wanted to be nice and kind and all I had was these men putting the distance and taking me for granted…

    Now I follow YOUR rules and I have this aweseome guy chasing me and taking me out on the dates 😉 and it feels awesome….
    And it takes time AND PATIENCE because I give him all the space he needs and I do almost nothing, just accepting his invitations and being nice and funny when we see each other…He asked me the exclusivity, he committed , all by himself….
    And he says: oh you’re different from the other woman
    and I smile….

    And even if it won’t work with him, there will be another man and now I know how to deal with them to feel great and not to loose myself and my dignity

    grazie 😉

    • Misha,

      How wonderful that you have overhauled your behavior and are enjoying the rewards! You deserve the awesome guy because YOU have treated yourself like a prize.

      And yes, you are different from other women. Other women are hounding him but he only wants the one who is separating herself from the herd, the one with dignity and class!

      Congratulations that he asked you for an exclusive commitment all by himself without your help, hint, and initiation. I hope everyone gets to read your testimony. Thank you for reading the blog and I’m thrilled it is helping you!

  18. Mon permalink

    Just recently I got out of a starting relationship where I did everything that I shouldn’t; initiate dates, being needy, not giving him time to miss me, etc. I moved overseas for a few months and I found this blog strolling on the www. Now, a few weeks later I’m in touch with an old flame that looked me up where I’m at and I can practice all that is in this blog and it works! He is pursuing, making an effort taking me out, even paying everything (which I feel a bit uncomfortable about) and I feel valued, like a lady, attractive, everything that I want to feel! Just by letting him pursue. I bet he’s happy too that he get’s to set the rules (he thinks). Will let you know how it evolves cause we’re apart now but will see him in a few weeks again. Thanks again for you and you’re advice and sticking your neck out to make us woman happy in love.

    • Mon,

      Glad you are doing things differently now and seeing that it does work! This makes it all worthwhile knowing that my blog is helping you and other women in recognizing their own true worth and deserving way more than crumbs.

      Feeling uncomfortable with letting a man pay is usually associated with feeling as if you have to repay him in some way.

      I have more to say on the matter! Please sign up at Get In-Depth Advice Now for confidential Email Exchange.

      Hope to assist you.

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